Wednesday, June 29, 2005

"Bill, Our Marriage is Dysfunctional in Two Contradictory Ways"

Everybody but Ed Klein seems to think Ed Klein said that Bill Clinton raped Hillary Clinton, resulting in the birth of Chelsea Clinton.

Funny, but I'll be a lot of people all excited about this new Hillary "character issue" also loved the old claim that Hillary once screamed, "Bill I need to be f***** more than twice a year!"

Apparently this comes from Jeffrey Toobin's book "A Vast Conspiracy". State Trooper Roger Perry told it to David Brock when Brock was the right-wing media's top journalist and was investigating the "Troopergate" story. (I have read this book, but it was years ago, and I no longer have a copy. This information is from the web article at the beginning of this paragraph.)

On the net, of course, I've also seen the source for this quote identified as Gennifer Flowers or an anonymous "friend" of Hillary. Conservatives can never be accused of single-sourcing a quote, eh?

Of course, the claims are completely contradictory, but that doesn't matter to The Clintons' foes. As long as Bill & Hillary are portrayed as sexually dysfunctional their enemies don't really care in what way.

BTW, Ed Klein has been "Walter Scott" of "Walter Scott's Personality Parade" for Parade magazine since 1991. I find this funny, since (as my fiancee can attest) I've been following that column for years just to read its incredibly pro-Republican biased political "answers."

Tuesday, June 28, 2005

Why I Support Dean

Because I'm tired of watching Democrats wring their hands while Republicans wring their necks.

A Story Worthy of the One Finger Salute

Well, that missing Boy Scout in Utah managed to keep Fox News viewers' mind off of the Downing Street Memo for a day or two...and why did it happen?

"We've also told him don't talk to strangers... When an ATV [all-terrain vehicle] or horse came by, he got off the trail. ... When they left, he got back on the trail."

"His biggest fear, he told me, was someone would steal him," she said

Great...missing children mania produces missing children, which produces missing children mania...

Monday, June 27, 2005

New Scrawl

My brother is taking part in a satirical project in which he plays a Fox News Anchor. He asked me for help writing the "news crawl ticker" at the bottom of the screen.

Here's what I came up with:

GETTING BETTER: US Troop celebrate third anniversary of insurgency's final throes

GLUB, GLUB: John Kerry leaves goldfish to die while carrying two senior citizens, baby down drainpipe of burning building

REFORM US: Bush's Social Security reform plan receives 100% approval rating in recent poll of Gitmo detainees

POTTY MIND: Sun newspaper to release shocking photographs of Saddam defecating into white porcelain bowl in prison cell

TO THE RESCUE: US military recruiting offices across nation besieged by Young Republicans trying to enlist for Iraq Occupation

MISSING WOMAN: Sara Knowles, of Wall Walla Washington disappears after family picnic; police investigating - never mind, turns out she's black

Donald Rumsfeld downgrades Britain to "Old Europe" status. New Europe now consists of Poland & Estonia

ON O'REILLY FACTOR: "Are Spiders Stealing my socks?"

ON HANNITY & COLMES: Hannity challenges Colmes to see who can hit the softest

NEW AMENDMENT: Burning US Flag punishable by prison; burning Confederate Flag punishable by lynching

ON HANNITY & COLMES: Does Colmes' mother smell like farts?

Three Idaho farmers declare their land an independent nation, are quickly inducted into Coalition of Willing.

Florida lab technician sentenced to death after dropping Petri dish of stem cells

57 percent of people polled by Harris give Bush an "unfavorable" rating, are questioned by Secret Service

US Government grants asylum status to Tony Blair

Monday, June 20, 2005

Wacky Races: Red or Blue?

RED:
Penelope Pitstop (She's from the south.)
Arkansas Chugabug (Ditto, though Blubber Bear may harbor doubts about the President.)
Rufus Ruffcut (C'mon, he's a logger.)
Army Surplus Special (They're military guys, though their patience may be waning.)

BLUE
Peter Perfect (Polite, Big chin, easily pushed around...He Practically IS John Kerry)
Professor Pat Pending (he's a scientist. How can he NOT be blue?)
Creepy Coupe (They're Goths)

UNDETERMINED/NON-VOTER
Red Max (military, yes, but also European)
Boulder Mobile (They watch Fox, but still don't vote)
Anthill Mob (Can't vote because they're ex-cons)
Dastardly and Muttley (They combine Karl Rove's ethics with Bob Shrum's competence.)

PollKatz: Fox News MIA

PollKatz, my favorite compendium of Bush Approval polls, has noted that Fox News didn't release a Bush approval poll for May, after having released monthly polls on this subject since Bush went into office.

BTW, I love Pollkatz. He was the first to turn me on to Bush's steadily declining numbers, but I miss his "pincer" graph, which compared Bush's declining approval ratings to his climbing disapproval ratings. I used to peek every week, waiting for the two lines to cross. Fortunately, there's this graphic, which is just as good.

But why did he drop the chart comparing Bush's approval ratings to his recent predecessors? That one would be fun to read now.

Tuesday, June 14, 2005

It's Not Justice When the Cloth Covers Everything on Your Face EXCEPT Your Eyes

From Reuters via the Daily Kos

On a voice vote and without opposition, the Senate passed a resolution expressing its regrets to the relatives as well as to the nearly 5,000 Americans -- mostly black males -- who were documented as having been lynched from 1880 to 1960 [...]
Snip.
No lawmaker opposed the measure, but 20 of the 100 senators had not signed a statement of support of it shortly before a vote was taken on a nearly empty Senate floor.

"I think it's politics. They're afraid of losing votes from people of prejudice," Duster said of those who did not sign the statement of support.

Silly Senators. You didn't need a voice vote to hide your identities. What do you think these were invented for?

P.S. Kos had found them all, and they're all Republicans.

Oh My God! You Killed Your Credibility! You Bastard!

Howard Dean, Loose Cannon:

"My view is that Fox News is a propaganda outlet for the Republican Party and I don't comment on Fox News.''

Brian Anderson, author of South Park Conservatives: The Revolt Against Liberal Media Bias, bursts his bubble:

But is it really so conservative? Every time I turn Fox on I see liberal guests yammering away, even real left-wing characters like Ted Rall or Robert Jensen. Does anybody know Greta Van Susteren's politics? I always thought she was a liberal.

***

Little Child, Loose Cannon:

"But he hasn't got anything on," a little child said.

His Father bursts his bubble

"Did you ever hear such innocent prattle?" said its father.

Sunday, June 12, 2005

Dean: If He Hollers, Let Him Go For It

There's been a lot of criticism of DNC Chairman Howard Dean lately, almost all of it from the right. This here's a collection of cartoons, all obviously dovetailing with the GOP view of Dean.

But it was this cartoon that got my attention. I actually think it's another attack on him, but all it makes me think is, go Dean, go!

Friday, June 10, 2005

Wacky Races

I used my Netflix account to revisit an old pleasure of my youth, the Hanna-Barbera Saturday morning cartoon series Wacky Races.

Considering I was four years old when it started its two-year run I remembered a lot of it: The odd opening sequence which depicted the start of the race against the same psychedelic background each week, the way each cartoon would begin in mid-race (because the opening credits were the "start"), and the end, when the words "The End" would actually fall onto Dick Dastardly and Muttley, the show's villains and stars.

It must've been made well for a four-year-old mind, because I understood the plot even if the credits confused me. Eleven crazy race cars in a big race somewhere in the world, with Dick Dastardly and Muttley trying to cheat everyone else, but always coming in last when their tricks backfired.

I always understood that Dick was a bad sport, but I did sort of wish he'd win just once, sort of like I wished that dog would catch the freaky chuckwagon in that old dogfood commercial (and conversely, that Lucky the Leprechuan would get away from those stupid kids.) Oh, and I sometimes confused Professor Pat Pending with Bozo the Clown (whom I confused with Ronald McDonald, whom I confused with Cesar Romero's Joker).

I was happy to find it got a DVD release thanks to a new cult following it got from a video game version and from its devoted fan base in Japan, where it is part of an elite group of non-Japanese cartoons (the others are Disney, Warner Brothers, and Peanuts) that are perennially available as licensed products.

On first re-viewing, the show was a big disappointment, a gag-heavy, story-thin narrative always (pardon the phrase) running on empty. But the more I watched it, the more I liked it. I think I might even rent the other two discs in the series. I think it boils down to Dastardly, Muttley, and the dizzyingly large cast and their terrifically designed crazy cars. Once you get used to the 10-11 minute run, it's fun to watch the gags come and go until the inevitable finale when you see who wins that episode's race.

BTW, in case you wonder who was the highest-ranked wacky race, there's a fun site with the actual win stats. I'd say it's the Anthill Mob, with four wins and five 2nd place finishes.

Thursday, June 09, 2005

@#%&!

Bob Says:


Sometimes, ya just have to say it!
Behave,
Robert

True, Bob, but as this is for the time being a family blog, you'll have to click the link for the uncensored version

Rude Pundit


..."This manufactured uproar over Dean all started in earnest (this time) with his appearance on Meet the Press on May 22, where, in so many words, Dean said, "Republicans are vile [censored] who deserve nothing less than to be [censored] by legions of diarrhea-ridden cows. They have [censored] the Congress, the Presidency, the judiciary, and the world. Now why should I play nice with those[censored] evil powermad [censored] like Tom DeLay?" And then the fun started, with Bill O'Reilly, who really ought to be [censored] with a microphone, vomiting out that Howard Dean was "a bitter and increasingly incoherent man." Last night, O'Reilly attacked Dean again, saying he was "nonsensical." But, of course, O'Reilly also was begging Dean to come on his show. Because, you see, Bill O'Reilly is a[censored]. Look, Dean's the party chair. His job is to raise money, rally the troops, and bring people into the party. His success or failure is measured in bank accounts and mailing lists. And he's a failed presidential candidate. The party establishment could have tossed him out to the exile pile with Al Gore, who keeps making amazing, passionate, intelligent speeches with all the impact of a [censored] at a System of a Down concert. But instead, the Democratic power elite decided to use Dean and his grassroots army of e-mail savvy warriors to regain relevance. They knew what they were getting. And if Dean becomes the lightning rod, so much the better for whoever is running in 2008. Besides, ain't it fun to watch Hannity and Coulter and Gingrich and Hume and all the other hate-filled sociopaths flail about and try to take Dean down? You've seen Dean's arms? Big, thick [censored]. He can bear it. And he can throw it back at them. As long as those behind him don't put him in handcuffs "

Wednesday, June 08, 2005

You Want the Truth? You Can't Pay Attention to the Truth!

Bill Says:

Would you please put this on your Blog. Why isn't this front-page news?

from
http://www.boston.com/news/world/europe/articles/2005/06/08/excerpts_of_the_
downing_street_memo/?rss_id=Boston+Globe+--+World+News


Matthew Rycroft, a top foreign policy aide to Prime Minister Tony Blair,

wrote the memo, which is dated July 23, 2002, based on notes he took during
a meeting of Blair and his advisers. The memo was first disclosed by The
Sunday Times on May 1:

C [reported to be Richard Dearlove, the head of Britain's intelligence
service who had recently met with Bush administration officials] reported on
his recent talks in Washington. There was a perceptible shift in attitude.
Military action was now seen as inevitable. Bush wanted to remove Saddam
[Hussein], through military action, justified by the conjunction of
terrorism and WMD. But the intelligence and facts were being fixed around
the policy. The NSC [US National Security Council] had no patience with the
UN route, and no enthusiasm for publishing material on the Iraqi regime's
record. There was little discussion in Washington of the aftermath after
military action. . . .

The defense secretary [Geoffrey Hoon] said that the United States had
already begun ''spikes of activity" to put pressure on the regime. No
decisions had been taken, but he thought the most likely timing in US minds
for military action to begin was January. . . .

The foreign secretary [Jack Straw] said he would discuss this with Colin
Powell this week. It seemed clear that Bush had made up his mind to take
military action, even if the timing was not yet decided. But the case was
thin. Saddam was not threatening his neighbors, and his WMD capability was
less than that of Libya, North Korea, or Iran. We should work up a plan for
an ultimatum to Saddam to allow back in the UN weapons inspectors. This
would also help with the legal justification for the use of force. . . .

The prime minister said that it would make a big difference politically and
legally if Saddam refused to allow in the UN inspectors. Regime change and
WMD were linked in the sense that it was the regime that was producing the
WMD.

Source: The Sunday Times

My short answer is the great "Tom the Dancing Bug" strip in Salon. (Subscription required, though I think they can make conditional exceptions for one-time views.)

True war-watching tales: Caught in the grip of a war so boring and repetitive, Americans can hardly stand it!

Tuesday, June 07, 2005

When There's Liddy, Liddy, Liddy at the Table, Table, Table then the GOP Agenda You Enable, Able, Able

Bill Says...

The Right-Wing attempt to paint Felt as dishonorable is a joke, Especially on Fox! How can they hire convicted criminals such as Liddy and North but then take that sort of attitude on Felt?

Agreed. Media Matters even illustrated how convicted Watergate criminals were allowed to comment on Felt without noting their role in the worst presidential scandal since Harding.

Monday, June 06, 2005

You Know Who I Hate? Mickey Kaus.

Mickey Kaus, The Democrats' own Doctor Smith looks at a recent NYT article on the increasing disparity of wealth. [bold words in the original]

What he doesn't answer is the important question on the relationship between (a) and (b), namely how much richer would they have gotten if they hadn't gotten the tax cuts? ... When I looked at this question in the early 90s, the answer was pretty clear: the rich were growing richer due to changes in the underlying economy (e.g. greater rewards for skills) that affected their pretax income, not changes in the tax code

Well, here's the big question you avoided, Mickey: If the rich keep getting richer, why is the tax burden being shifted off them?

Mickey then goes on to suggest that the reporter

seems to assume we'll be so outraged that the "hyper-rich" are getting tax cuts at all that we won't ask if denying them the tax cuts would actually be enough to stop them from getting richer.

Of course, this is an assumption of Mickey's part. Mickey has cast this as a class envy issue. Mickey ignores the fact that the article also shows that since 1980 "the share earned by the bottom 90 percent fell."

I could go on, but I'd just get pissed. I hate Mickey Kaus.

P.S. My spell check suggests I replace "Mickey's" with "Miscue's". That brightened my mood a bit.

Bob Says: More on Kim Alexis

Regarding this previous post on the beautiful conservative who sells poop medicine on Hannity & Colmes.

"Kim Alexis is a world famous supermodel blessed with great insight and wisdom. Below, Kim shares her views on self-respect, sex, life and marriage."

http://www.prolife.com/ALEXIS-3.htm

A bit more on the right's new Aryan Poster bimbo, Kim Alexis. Thanks for the blog Tom. Keep at it. Be well, Bob

Thanks for the encouragement, Bob. I'm just beginning to realize that not many people post here because you have to set up a blog just to post a response. Wish I'd paid more attention when I set this up, as I think that's a stupid rule. There's enough blogs on the 'net without forcing people to make them.

Thursday, June 02, 2005

I Forgot What Those Words Mean...

I got involved in a News Hounds discussion about John Gibson's speculation that "Hollywood" knew who Deep Throat was because a photo of Hal Holbrook looked like a photo of Mark Felt as he looks now.

My point can be read in the comments (I'm Howard_Beale). But before I posted I went looking for photos of Holbrook as he looked in ATPM (and other films of the time) and Felt as he looked during Watergate.

I started with a Google search

Felt Deep-Throat

And went to the "Images" tab.

Not a good idea.